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Breaking Through the Barriers: Confronting Fears, One Step at a Time

Mon, 13 Nov 2023 16:10:59 GMT

Who could have predicted that I would uncover growth that extended far beyond the finish line in pursuing a medal?

Leading up to the race, I anticipated it to be a monumental accomplishment, a culmination of a year of relentless training and three years of meticulous planning. The emotional intensity was inevitable.

As I stood at the starting line, the weight of anticipation mingled with the crisp morning air. The first wave of fear hit me — the fear of failure. What if I couldn't endure the grueling course I had meticulously prepared for? Doubt crept in, but I reminded myself of the countless hours I'd invested with every step.

Navigating through the rugged terrain, there were moments when the steep drop-offs triggered a fear of heights. My heart raced, and my legs felt like jelly. I drew strength from the training that prepared me for such challenges in those instances. One step at a time, I conquered the heights that once paralyzed me.

Then came the night, bringing a challenge I hadn't fully anticipated. I veered off the trail in the dark woods, and panic set in as I realized I was lost. The fear of being alone in the wilderness, disoriented and far from the finish line, threatened to overwhelm me. Yet, at that moment, my phone's GPS became my guiding light. It wasn't just a technological tool but a lifeline that reoriented me and reassured me that I was on the right path.

Sleep deprivation played its cruel trick as the race continued into the night. Hallucinations danced at the edge of my consciousness, blurring the line between reality and imagination. Shadows took on eerie forms, and the trail seemed to twist and turn surreally. It was a battle against my mind. In those disorienting moments, I leaned into my faith, allowing it to be a beacon of strength. The fear of the unknown morphed into a profound trust that carried me through the surreal landscape.

Crossing the finish line wasn't just a physical achievement; it marked the conquest of fears that had haunted me throughout the race. Moments of self-doubt, fear of failure, and the relentless pursuit of success—all conquered with every stride.

Reflecting, I realize the race wasn't just about the physical challenge; it was a profound exploration of my resilience. The fear didn't magically disappear; it lingered. But in those lingering moments, I found strength by reliving the triumphs over fear during the race.

The race may be over, but the echoes of those fear-filled moments still resonate. They serve as a reminder that fear isn't an obstacle but a companion in the journey of self-discovery. As I contemplate the prospect of another race or the pursuit of a long-held dream, I carry with me the knowledge that fear, once confronted, loses its grip, opening the path to new possibilities.

As you reach the end of this narrative, you may find echoes of your fears, aspirations, and the untapped strength within you. The journey is universal, and the triumph over fears is a shared human experience.

I hope I have helped you understand you are not alone in your journey. I share my journey so you may find comfort, inspiration, and hope.

Packing and the emotional toll it took

Fri, 09 Jun 2023 18:11:39 GMT

The transformation continues!

We are in June, and so much has transformed since January.

The move is almost complete. If you have not heard, we are leaving our home in Madison, WI, to move to Florida. A good 95% there. In this journey, my emotional health has been all over the place. Emotional health is one of the aspects of mental health. We all have simultaneously felt all forms of emotions, even mixed feelings.

My move was about decluttering and removing everything from my home, selling it, giving it to family, or donating it. We are moving into a furnished home. I mean A to Z.

Everything needed to go except personal items; initially, everything went smoothly. The emotion of joy and excitement was all through my body. As with any transformation, the first part was easy until I got into the hard stuff.

I was simultaneously overwhelmed, discouraged, sad, and happy with each layer removed. So many emotions I was exhausted or paralyzed with overwhelm that I would mindlessly binge on TV.

Some of my self-discoveries through this process have been enlightening.

Well, I am saying enlightening with tongue n cheek. You see, I was removing items I have accumulated over many years and moved from one location to another. Now I was at the point where I decided on each item.

I began to understand my obsession with filling rooms and closets with stuff. I would shop, especially when I was lonely or bored. The hunt was a big thrill. I would tell myself all the money I saved on the purchased items. Now I was giving, selling, or repurposing these items I saved money on.

Another realization was my people pleasing. I was looking a certain way to make someone else happy. The statement: Can't you find something else to wear? I'm not too fond of that. After all these years and all the work, I felt like I am still discovering myself.

Here are some of the questions I asked myself to guide me with my decluttering and letting go:

What value does this item bring you, and how will you use it?

If it is sentimental to you, how can you store that memory if you don't have the item?

Where will you place this item, and do you even have a place for it?

Lastly, How will your life change if you do not have this item?

These were some different questions on how I began looking at my items.

What are you holding on to that you might be able to get rid of? Do you shop to fill open spaces, out of boredom, or just because?

One year ago I needed a break and stopped!

Tue, 20 Dec 2022 14:59:43 GMT

Almost one year ago I stopped this

Well, it has almost been one full year. I can not believe it. I have yet to talk much about this because it was a process. I did not understand how hard it would be at times, and now I look back and think, wow!

This January 2023, I will not have had one drop of alcohol for one full year. Not a sip or one drink here or there, I mean not one drop. Why, you might ask?

There were a few reasons:

Once I was in full menopause, I found I had less tolerance for alcohol. The feeling the next day was not good.
While I was drinking, I experienced headaches or stomach issues. I did try more organic alcohols and wine; however, it still was not working for me.
As I began training for my race, I found that alcohol inhibited my performance. That is plain and simple.
Lastly, my need for alcohol increased when I felt stressed, sad, or overwhelmed. Alcohol is an anti-depressant and not the best option when you have all those other feelings.

I decided not to drink for 30 days, then it went to 60 days, then 90 days, and I could not think of a reason to drink. I saw people bewildered that I was out and about, at bars, still having a great time and not drinking. Finally, I found great non-alcoholic drinks, and I promised myself that having a good time is not controlled by alcohol.

As I go into 2023, I will continue with this process because I feel better, my skin is better, my mind is more precise, and I love not having that sick feeling any longer. What about you? What can you change for one day and then add another day after that?

Have you heard of the scarcity mindset

Fri, 22 Apr 2022 16:33:00 GMT

I know I did not understand the concept until someone said to me, "Did you know your thoughts can be what you make them?" Then, when I looked around, I felt like I was thinking of what my life was. The concept of my changing how I looked at a situation was foreign until I practiced the idea.

A scarcity mindset is when a person focuses on something they don't have or obsess over the lack of money or time. The person will have tunnel vision on the subject, which affects the person's mental health.

When in a scarcity mindset, the thoughts one might say are, I can't do that, I will never be as good as, I will never have enough money, there is not enough time in the day, or there is not enough to go around.

It is never too late, or you are never too old to change your mindset. I am glad I adjusted through daily practices.

Follow a few of these tips to help make the shift from scarcity to abundance.

Our brain can only process so much information. So why not have that information be one of abundance that will make your everyday life move forward to the life we desire and deserve.

Why I removed candles from my home.

Tue, 12 Apr 2022 14:50:00 GMT

Here is the reason why I ditched and switched!

I love candles; I love their smell and lighting them. The ambiance of candles also brings warmth and homeness to a room. So I go thru TJ Maxx or Marshalls, smelling all the scents, and bring them home.

As I stood smelling all the beautiful candles in the store, I started to sneeze. So I turned to candle over to see the ingredients for the candle. I had never thought about what made up a candle; I thought of wax and fragrant. Amazing what happens when you do a little research.

Research has found that most brands of scented candles use 95% of chemicals that make up "synthetic fragrance," which include paraffin, lead, benzene, and toluene. The last two are known carcinogens which means you are releasing hazardous toxins into the air you are breathing. These chemicals also are capable of causing allergies and hormone disrupters that can cause weight gain, hormonal acne, mood swings, anxiety, stress, and additional side effects.

I removed candles from my home and replaced them with diffusers and essential oils. Now buying oils can be as tricky as buying candles. Most oils sold in department stores have synthetic fragrances. So I have chosen a pure essential oil of Young Living.

I also love the moods candles give off, and I have filled my homes with flameless candles. As I set my diffuser for the day, I can set the perspective of the day as I wish and have flameless candles going when I want the ambiance of the candles.

Additional benefits from diffusing. I do not need to worry about knocking over or leaving a candle going. Diffusing is safe, cool to the tough, and runs on a timer if you wish.

Here is my link to the Young Living website; if you want to know, look at diffusing or switching and Ditching. Click Here

Lean in! Do it Messy

Thu, 31 Mar 2022 11:00:00 GMT

What does that mean? How long have your been thinking of doing something? How many times have you planned it out? How many times have you stopped because it is too overwhelming?

That has been me, and I had even had a complete plan and all these detailed notes and processes, I would not complete any of it.

Perfections or having all the answers to be successful is a myth. Yet, this is one of the most significant components of procrastination.

Now my motto is: LEAN IN! DO IT MESSY!

Lean in means being uncomfortable with the process, and that's okay. However, I am not perfect, and there is no perfect plan, and I am ecstatic about that. Why? I had had some of my most significant accomplishments when I showed up and was uncomfortable.

Let me be honest! Doing it messy is scary; however, you take perfection pressure off you.

This new thinking means a mindset shift of being open to failure. Failure leads to learning, exploring, fine-tuning, changing, or rebuilding. Failure does not lead to giving up, defeat, loss, or underachiever.

So remember, the next time you are contemplating goals or changes.

LEAN IN! DO IT MESSY!

Daily Emotions

Fri, 23 Apr 2021 20:53:00 GMT

Angst, Anxiety, Uneasiness, Fear .
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These emotions introduce themselves into my mindset daily. Sometimes I have no clue how the emotion got there. But there it is!!!⁠
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Screws with my thoughts, behavior, and frame of mind. ⁠
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I change plans, change directions with goals, change decisions and missed out. ⁠
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It seems the older I am, the more fear has crept into my frame of thought. I was living my life in a state of fear. ⁠
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That all changed when I found the secret sauce. ⁠

This takes work, change of mindset, and dedication. ⁠
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But ask yourself, doesn't anything worthwhile take work, mindset and dedication? ⁠

Age: Embrace It

Fri, 23 Apr 2021 20:30:00 GMT

Am I the only one who has these self-doubt talks with themselves? ⁠Please don't leave me hanging.
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Mine goes something like this: You are 61 what makes you think you can do that? Or, your time has passed. It's too late!! ⁠

WHAT? Why are you saying that?
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A few weeks ago at a women's retreat I faced my self-doubt talk reality head on. I had to turn to the women next to me, then proceed to tell her about this self doubt as if I was telling her that about herself. Imagining telling that to someone and crushing their dreams. ⁠
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If you want a shot of reality that was one quick way of getting it. ⁠
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So, it got me thinking more about age! What is the meaning of age? ⁠
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The length of an existence extending from the beginning to any given time. Pretty philosophical ! ⁠
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That's it so why do we make such a fuss of it. The definition does not put any parameters around when we should or should not be able to do something. ⁠
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I am embracing my age with grace, grit, and love. I am not going to allow the age of 61 to be the factor that stops me from doing or being the person I am striving to be. A wellness coach, trail runner, and anything else I want⁠.

Failure Consumes Me

Fri, 23 Apr 2021 20:26:00 GMT

Failure consumes me! ⁠
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All my great intentions, plans in place, energy high, and expectations even higher. ⁠
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Then I start to lose momentum, energy levels start to diminish, and plans are falling apart. ⁠
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Another goal failure. I declare to myself this was not meant to be. ⁠
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The more the same circle of failure kept repeating itself, the more I had a destructive mindset. ⁠
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"Insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results." per Albert Einstein. ⁠
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Insanity was not my problem, doing it alone was. Who was I accountable to? ⁠
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Don't be afraid or ashamed to stand up and say "I needed help, a coach, or an accountability partner." I did. ⁠
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My tribe is a like minded, goal oriented community. Bolstering my commitment, energy levels, and expectations daily. ⁠
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Let me assure you, they hold me accountable, push my limits and do not allow for excuses. ⁠
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What are you working on achieving right now? Are you hitting any roadblocks? ⁠

The Journey to Loving My Body

Fri, 23 Apr 2021 20:17:00 GMT

I hate that feeling! ⁠
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Some days are dark with those negative stories running around in my brain. ⁠
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The feelings of low self esteem, ineffectiveness, body image, and so much more! ⁠
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They seem so real, so authentic, so true, and everyone sees it! ⁠
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Then I challenged myself! How can I revise my story I am telling myself? CHANGE MY MINDSET! ⁠
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Imagine that each one of those negative thoughts are fueling your desire to change. What would your story look like? ⁠
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For me, body image is one of those repeating stories. Now each day I am thankful for my beautiful body. ⁠
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I love the fact that I have the privilege to exercise, to eat right, and to have my own style. ⁠
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My body blesses every day and there is no other one like it. ⁠
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Not everyday is perfect, I am a work in progress! My work in progress is better than a day filled with negative self loathing thoughts. I LOVE ME! ⁠

Anxiety: That Was Sneaky

Fri, 23 Apr 2021 19:56:00 GMT

At times anxiety hits me right in the chest, no warnings or a heads up. In the middle of the night, when I wake in the morning or sometime during my productive day. ⁠ ⁠

Anxiety, you are nothing but a coward.

For years, I allowed you to govern my feelings. Survival resulted with the help of drugs and lots of alcohol. It was debilitating. ⁠

I wanted more, I wanted a gratifying, worthwhile life. One that allowed me to be authentic to Michele. ⁠

⁠ With grit, grace, and uphill battle, I found her. Today, I still have my moments of anxiety. It shows up as nervousness, apprehension, doubt or in other disguises. The difference now, I know how to control the symptoms. ⁠

I am in command of my anxiety. I have built my toolbox to recognize the symptoms. Then, I use the system listed above to extinguish my anxiety. ⁠

PSA! I am not against prescribed medication. I encourage it under an excellent doctor's care. That is how I started my journey and this is the path I am traveling now. ⁠